CSU Chico on Self Awareness
Self-awareness is the building block to which all elements of Emotional Intelligence are built upon. It is important to gain a full understanding of your emotions and how they relate to others in order to effectively make decisions both in and out of the workplace. Self awareness is defined as understanding what is important to you, understanding how you experience things, knowing what you want, knowing how you feel, and knowing how you come across to others (Weisinger, 1998). By developing self-awareness through these five elements, you will be more prepared to make decisions that will not only increase your emotional satisfaction, but also the satisfaction of the people you interact with.
Emotional intelligence is based on the idea that you must first become aware of your emotions before you are able to alter your behavior for better results. Studies show that managers who maintain a high level of self-awareness posses more aspects of EQ and are therefore rated as more effective by both superiors and subordinates than those who are not self-aware (Harvard Business Review). Knowledge about the nature of your personality is vital to making sound decisions. Emotional awareness is knowing what emotions you are feeling and why, and understanding the links between your feelings and your actions (Goleman, 1999). In other words, its the ability to take a step back from the situation to become aware of what's happening rather than become immersed in it and loose control (Goleman, 1998).
Tuning into emotions is not easy for most people. Dr. John D. Mayer, a psychologist at the University of New Hampshire, has identified three categories that he believes people fall into when it comes to identifying and dealing with their emotions.
Self-aware. These people are aware of their moods as they are having them. Their mindfulness helps them manage their emotions. When they are in a bad mood they don't obsess about it, and are able to get out of it sooner.
Engulfed. These are people who often feel swamped by their emotions and helpless to escape them, as though their emotions have taken charge. They are not very aware of their feelings, so that they are lost in them rather than having some perspective. As a result, they do little to try to escape bad moods, feeling they have not control over their emotional life. They often feel overwhelmed and emotionally out of control.
Accepting. While these people are often clear about what they are feeling, they also tend to be accepting of their moods, and so don't try to change them. There seem to be two branches of the accepting type: those who are usually in good moods and so have little motivation to change them, and people who, despite their clarity about their moods, are susceptible to bad ones but accept them with a laissez-faire attitude, doing nothing to change them despite their distress- a pattern found among depressed people who are resigned to their despair (Goleman, 1998).
As you can see, self-awareness is not getting carried away with emotions, but rather objectively identifying them in order to take control of the subsequent actions resulting from these emotions. By acknowledging your emotions, you can manage them, deal with them and then move on. This is very difficult for some people to do. It is much easier at times to just ignore, deny or rationalize your emotions. It is crucial, however, for us to develop an understanding of what we are feeling in order to use our emotions intelligently.
Emotions can tell us through instant feedback whether a decision or act is right for us. What we call "gut feelings" or " intuition" are feelings that have been formed by experiences in our past. By tuning into these gut feelings, we are able to use information about similar situations that we have experienced in the past. This is particularly important in recognizing what is important to you, knowing what you want and how you feel in different situations. Gut feelings can identify your true intentions in a situation. If you feel happy, satisfied, or content with a decision, it is a good indication that your decision coincided with your true intention. However, if you start to resent, or feel uneasy in a situation, you probably did not go with your true intention. Self-awareness allows you to connect with emotions, thoughts, and actions (Susik & Megerian, 1999).
Emotions are not just psychological impulses; they are also physiological "feelings." One way of identifying an emotion is to understand where in your body you feel that emotion. For example, think about where in your body you feel fear. Does your stomach ache, or do parts of your body grow tight? What about love or anger (Steiner, 1997)? If you can become aware of where these emotions physically occur in your body, it will be easier for you to identify them and act accordingly.
Along with becoming emotionally aware, you must also learn to become aware of your actions. One way to do this is by examining how you make appraisals. Appraisals are all of the different impressions, interpretations, evaluations, and expectations you have about yourself, others, and situations (Weisinger, 1998). These appraisals are largely influenced by your personal filter. It takes everything you gather as sensory data, information gathered through your five senses, and interprets it through a filter of information already stored in you mind. People with a high self-awareness are conscious of the filtering process and how it affects their perceptions. Negative appraisals can lead to self-fulfilling prophecies. However, being aware of this allows you to change your attitudes and actions. Becoming aware of your thoughts allows you to understand how they influence your feelings, actions and reactions thus allowing you to alter them accordingly.
Shortcomings in Emotional Intelligence come from habit learned early on (Fisher, 1998). Self-awareness is the first step to identifying and changing your behaviors. In order to change a habit, you must first notice when you're falling into it, and second, practice a different response. "By being aware, you can do a little better each time you try" (Farnham, 1996).
Emotional intelligence is based on the idea that you must first become aware of your emotions before you are able to alter your behavior for better results. Studies show that managers who maintain a high level of self-awareness posses more aspects of EQ and are therefore rated as more effective by both superiors and subordinates than those who are not self-aware (Harvard Business Review). Knowledge about the nature of your personality is vital to making sound decisions. Emotional awareness is knowing what emotions you are feeling and why, and understanding the links between your feelings and your actions (Goleman, 1999). In other words, its the ability to take a step back from the situation to become aware of what's happening rather than become immersed in it and loose control (Goleman, 1998).
Tuning into emotions is not easy for most people. Dr. John D. Mayer, a psychologist at the University of New Hampshire, has identified three categories that he believes people fall into when it comes to identifying and dealing with their emotions.
Self-aware. These people are aware of their moods as they are having them. Their mindfulness helps them manage their emotions. When they are in a bad mood they don't obsess about it, and are able to get out of it sooner.
Engulfed. These are people who often feel swamped by their emotions and helpless to escape them, as though their emotions have taken charge. They are not very aware of their feelings, so that they are lost in them rather than having some perspective. As a result, they do little to try to escape bad moods, feeling they have not control over their emotional life. They often feel overwhelmed and emotionally out of control.
Accepting. While these people are often clear about what they are feeling, they also tend to be accepting of their moods, and so don't try to change them. There seem to be two branches of the accepting type: those who are usually in good moods and so have little motivation to change them, and people who, despite their clarity about their moods, are susceptible to bad ones but accept them with a laissez-faire attitude, doing nothing to change them despite their distress- a pattern found among depressed people who are resigned to their despair (Goleman, 1998).
As you can see, self-awareness is not getting carried away with emotions, but rather objectively identifying them in order to take control of the subsequent actions resulting from these emotions. By acknowledging your emotions, you can manage them, deal with them and then move on. This is very difficult for some people to do. It is much easier at times to just ignore, deny or rationalize your emotions. It is crucial, however, for us to develop an understanding of what we are feeling in order to use our emotions intelligently.
Emotions can tell us through instant feedback whether a decision or act is right for us. What we call "gut feelings" or " intuition" are feelings that have been formed by experiences in our past. By tuning into these gut feelings, we are able to use information about similar situations that we have experienced in the past. This is particularly important in recognizing what is important to you, knowing what you want and how you feel in different situations. Gut feelings can identify your true intentions in a situation. If you feel happy, satisfied, or content with a decision, it is a good indication that your decision coincided with your true intention. However, if you start to resent, or feel uneasy in a situation, you probably did not go with your true intention. Self-awareness allows you to connect with emotions, thoughts, and actions (Susik & Megerian, 1999).
Emotions are not just psychological impulses; they are also physiological "feelings." One way of identifying an emotion is to understand where in your body you feel that emotion. For example, think about where in your body you feel fear. Does your stomach ache, or do parts of your body grow tight? What about love or anger (Steiner, 1997)? If you can become aware of where these emotions physically occur in your body, it will be easier for you to identify them and act accordingly.
Along with becoming emotionally aware, you must also learn to become aware of your actions. One way to do this is by examining how you make appraisals. Appraisals are all of the different impressions, interpretations, evaluations, and expectations you have about yourself, others, and situations (Weisinger, 1998). These appraisals are largely influenced by your personal filter. It takes everything you gather as sensory data, information gathered through your five senses, and interprets it through a filter of information already stored in you mind. People with a high self-awareness are conscious of the filtering process and how it affects their perceptions. Negative appraisals can lead to self-fulfilling prophecies. However, being aware of this allows you to change your attitudes and actions. Becoming aware of your thoughts allows you to understand how they influence your feelings, actions and reactions thus allowing you to alter them accordingly.
Shortcomings in Emotional Intelligence come from habit learned early on (Fisher, 1998). Self-awareness is the first step to identifying and changing your behaviors. In order to change a habit, you must first notice when you're falling into it, and second, practice a different response. "By being aware, you can do a little better each time you try" (Farnham, 1996).
posted by Nana @ 23:14
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